Story by Red Moon for the LSL News Team
Lucky Star Chef and sidekick Plan Relocation to Mars
Long time LSL chef and man about
town Allen "Tater" Kittle has made a
major life altering decision. Kittle will be
packing up the knives and dog along
with his sidekick, Sideshow Chris. He
will be headed to Mars.
Kittle admittedly knows little about Mars.
He also appears ready for the cold
temperatures and gravity issues.
" I've been doing some reading online. I
never knew that Mars was named after
candy bar."
Kittle has possible employment waiting
for him and Sideshow Chris.
" Well, a guy I met at a Phish concert
has a brother who's married to a chick
whose sister dates a guy that owns a
restaurant on Mars. I called him the
other day and left a message letting
him know we're on the way. Chris and I
are planning to have a few drinks with
him once we hit Mars."
I notice Chris is walking slowing, almost
dragging his feet. Upon further
investigation I see the cause. Sideshow .
Chris is wearing twenty pound ankle
weights.
" Tater told me on Mars we need to
wear these all the time or we'll float
away. But, when we're there it'll feel like
I'm normal and all and what not."
The trip to the Red Planet came to
Tater as a way to set his life in a new
direction.
" To tell you the truth," the orb faced
chef opined", I always wanted to move
to Mars. I heard the women are hot,
especially the one's up near the polar
ice caps where Sideshow Chris and I are
going."
"The guy we're meeting is Martin. I hear
he's a cool guy and owns a café up
there. I told him about my experience
with food, but honestly I don't know
about this gravity thing. I mean when I'm
making corn dogs or something will they
just float away? Another thing, will the ice
cubes float out of your drink glass?
There's a lot to learn about Mars."
As Sideshow Chris slowly walked past us
he spoke", I heard that Mars is made of
cheese!"
" That's Venus stupid," Kittle snapped
back.
"He's a nice kid and I have a lot to teach
him about interstellar travel and stuff."
True, the Lucky Star will miss the "Tater"
but the reaction from the ownership has
been positive.
"Tater is perfect for a job on Mars,"said
Co-Owner Trevor Lipton." They'll love
his dancing, his special corn dog recipes
and the special way his trousers hang off
his sweet sweet hips."
Allen"Tater" Kittle and sidekick  Sideshow
Chris leave next week for Mars