Legendary vegetable advocate Pumpkin Mike used the power of his personality to bring a huge throng together at his "Save the Vegetable Foundation" annual benefit. As ones and ones of people waited for the beloved temperamental star other celebrities in the audience kept the room awake in anticipation of PM's entrance. Celebrity thinker and Man About Town, Gary Duane Vaughan thrilled the captive crowd with amazing crossword tricks and an open forum on professional wrestlers of the 50's and 60's. LSL co-owner Patrick Patterson reminisced about his days with delicious rock singer Belinda Carlisle taking questions from the anxious attendees regarding Carlisle's favorite food, her bra size and how they met. As midnight approached those in attendance were determined to keep a happy face as they patiently waited for the star of the show. It was later reported to the crowd that Pumpkin's bus had broken down near Tweedle, Virginia. Another report had Mike currently in an Cuckoo, Virginia emergency room being treating for athlete's foot. Rumors were swirling about when Pumpkin Mike breezed into the room shortly after two am. |
| Local Group Formed to Support World Peas |
| Pumpkin Mike Returns the Love Through his Foundation Event |
| Manford Wayback has a worldly view. " I care about birdies and bambis and potato chips and babies. I like striped cats, small dogs, black squirrels and chocolate puddin'." He coincidently was slurping back a large bowl of his favorite desert. "Most of all I love Peas." Ask what about the small legume excited him. "Excuse me." Once again I asked Mr. Wayback to elaborate his views regarding the popular small green globe enjoyed by millions. " I don't understand he offered. I mean I like peas, but maybe not as much as, say, grilled asparagus or roasted corn or even green beans with a really good sauce. The SWP is not a group about peas. I think we have a mis-communication here." His cherub cheeks were now cherry red and pulsating."We support, we support, uh," he looked across the room to another member who simply threw up their hands," well I thought it was an alphabet thing. You know the letter P." Across the room another supporter said ", No Manford, we support the vegetable." Completely dumbfounded the former " No Fifty Deer Club" founder who mistakenly formed the club to protest the LSL Fifty Beer Club left the room and exited through a back door. |
| Pumpkin Mike drew the largest ovation of the night upon his entrance to the flower and vegetable covered stage. He stood with a light illuminating his long flowing hair at center stage acknowledging the love. At the sweep of the hand he silenced the audience with the Pumpkin magic we have all grown accustomed. " Tonight,' he calmly delivered," Tonight is a special night." After a short coughing spell Mike drank a few beers to soothe his throat, thanked the crowd for showing up and left with an attractive blond to a thunderous ovation. The night ended as the throng yelled for Pumpkin to return to the stage, but he was gone. His bus was seen careening down Main Street at a high rate of speed. Over eighty five dollars was raised for the "Save the Vegetable Foundation". |
| Attractive blond starlet seen on the arm of Pumpkin Mike identified as Lola Desdemona, an Argentine adult film actress and reportedly the "Save the Vegetable Foundation" Secretary-Treasuer also pictured is Pumpkin Mike with the late thespian Tom Bosley |
