Legendary vegetable advocate Pumpkin
Mike used the power of his personality
to bring a huge throng together at his
"Save the Vegetable Foundation"
annual benefit. As ones and ones of
people waited for the beloved
temperamental star other celebrities in
the audience kept the room awake in
anticipation of PM's entrance.
Celebrity thinker and Man About Town,
Gary Duane Vaughan thrilled the
captive crowd with amazing crossword
tricks and an open forum on
professional wrestlers of the 50's and
LSL co-owner Patrick Patterson
reminisced about his days with delicious
rock singer Belinda Carlisle
taking questions from the anxious
attendees regarding Carlisle's favorite
food, her bra size and how they met.
As midnight approached those in
attendance were determined to keep a
happy face as they patiently waited for
the star of the show.
It was later reported to the crowd that
Pumpkin's bus had broken down near
Tweedle, Virginia. Another report had
Mike currently in an Cuckoo, Virginia
emergency room being treating for
athlete's foot. Rumors were swirling
about when Pumpkin Mike breezed into
the room shortly after two am.
|Local Group Formed to Support
|Pumpkin Mike Returns the Love
Through his Foundation Event
|Manford Wayback has a worldly view. "
I care about birdies and bambis and
potato chips and babies. I like striped
cats, small dogs, black squirrels and
chocolate puddin'." He coincidently
was slurping back a large bowl of his
"Most of all I love Peas."
Ask what about the small legume
"Excuse me." Once again I asked Mr.
Wayback to elaborate his views
regarding the popular small green
globe enjoyed by millions.
" I don't understand he offered. I mean
I like peas, but maybe not as much as,
say, grilled asparagus or roasted corn
or even green beans with a really good
sauce. The SWP is not a group about
peas. I think we have a
mis-communication here." His cherub
cheeks were now cherry red and
pulsating."We support, we support, uh,"
he looked across the room to another
member who simply threw up their
hands," well I thought it was an
alphabet thing. You know the letter P."
Across the room another supporter
said ", No Manford, we support the
vegetable." Completely dumbfounded
the former " No Fifty Deer Club"
founder who mistakenly formed the
club to protest the LSL Fifty Beer
Club left the room and exited through
a back door.
|Pumpkin Mike drew the largest ovation
of the night upon his entrance to the
flower and vegetable covered stage.
He stood with a light illuminating his
long flowing hair at center stage
acknowledging the love.
At the sweep of the hand he silenced
the audience with the Pumpkin magic
we have all grown accustomed.
" Tonight,' he calmly delivered,"
Tonight is a special night." After a
short coughing spell Mike drank a few
beers to soothe his throat, thanked the
crowd for showing up and left with an
attractive blond to a thunderous
The night ended as the throng yelled
for Pumpkin to return to the stage, but
he was gone. His bus was seen
careening down Main Street at a high
rate of speed.
Over eighty five dollars was raised for
the "Save the Vegetable Foundation".
|Attractive blond starlet seen on the arm of
Pumpkin Mike identified as Lola
Desdemona, an Argentine adult film
actress and reportedly the "Save the
Vegetable Foundation" Secretary-Treasuer
also pictured is Pumpkin Mike with the late
thespian Tom Bosley